Running: My Love/Hate Relationship

Today is Monday, which means that my challenge starts a week from now. I decided to weigh myself and take my measurements to see what I'll be starting with next week. It was pretty rough. In the last two weeks of sitting around and not watching what I eat, I regained 3 lbs and about an inch everywhere. I had worked so hard for a month and a half to lose those pounds and inches, and here they are again. But instead of getting discouraged, I let it motivate me. I ended up going  to the gym to work out for the first time in two weeks.

Before today, my workouts at the gym were basically just walking on the treadmill at a super slow pace. I was still recovering from my c-section and wasn't really allowed to do much more than that or I'd risk hurting myself. Since I've been cleared by my doctor, I figured I should probably stop holding back and decided to go for a run. Well, I haven't been running in over three years, and I've always sucked at it. Like, really badly sucked at it. And since I'm such a terrible runner, I've never really enjoyed it. One of my long-term goals is to change all that. I want to enjoy running - or at least not totally hate it - and I want to be able to maintain a decent pace without gasping for air.

So, keeping all that in mind, I started my run today with a positive attitude. I was doing intervals of 90 seconds running/90 seconds walking, and it was going fine for a little bit. Then came the huffing and puffing that I know and love. (Well, the "know" part anyway.) Sweat was pouring into my eyes and my glasses were barely hanging onto the edge of my nose. I kept pushing them up, but what's the point of that when they just slide down again? I need to get contacts. Anyway, I was breathing hard and sweating everywhere, but I wanted to keep pushing myself because my new mindset is to not give up when things get hard.

The real problem came about 15 minutes into my workout. I was trying to do the run/walk for at least 25 minutes, but I had to stop because I started to feel like I was going to throw up. I know on the Biggest Loser they're all about just puking and continuing on, but I'm pretty sure that's not socially acceptable in a normal gym. No one wants to see my oatmeal and bananas cycling through the treadmill belt. I slowed way down, put the treadmill at an incline to try to save some of my workout, and focused on controlling my breathing, but my body was already pissed at me. I made it to the 25 minute mark, but by then I was at a slow walk and no more incline. I did manage to do 1.6 miles total, which is somewhat respectable considering how I felt.

I came home with mixed emotions. I know I did the best I could, so I'm proud of myself for that. But I know I need a lot of improvement (and I mean a lot) to reach my goal of being a decent runner, so in that aspect I felt a little bummed. I know this stuff doesn't happen overnight, so I'm going to keep at it and see what happens. I'm going to try to run at least 3 times a week, in addition to my other workouts. I'm hoping to see some improvement each time.

One more thing before I wrap up this post for the day. I think I'm going to go ahead and post my weekly measurements here for everyone to read. These first weeks are going to be embarrassing (believe me, it was a hard decision to put it all out here) but I know that I'll feel more accountable if everyone else knows whether I'm losing weight/inches or not. So here goes. *deep breath*

Weight: 201 lbs. (I would love to start my challenge next week with my weight being under 200 lbs. I'm making that my goal for this week.)

Waist: 39 in.

(I'm taking measurements of my chest, hips, arms, and thighs as well but I don't think they're as exciting to share.)

Ok, now it's officially out there. I'm blushing pretty hard just thinking about people knowing this stuff, but you what? One of my major goals is to not be ashamed of my weight anymore. So it's going to be awesome in the future when I can proudly post my achievements here for everyone to read, instead of worrying about whether people are going to judge me for how much I weigh now.

   (Me after my run)



Oh! One more thing and then I'll end this for real. I'm going to post stuff that inspires me on each blog entry in the hopes that maybe it will inspire someone else, too. So here's my inspiration for today:

"Man in the Mirror", from the movie Joyful Noise

I love love love this! Enjoy! (And now I really am done.)